The Origin of Shadows
by gillpillpiano13
Summary: Ciarda has a special power and Peter Pan wants to learn how to use it for himself (I won't spoil it here). However, with her power, her magic, of course comes a price, a curse on her. What does Pan have to do with it? I suck at summaries but do read and find out!
1. Chapter 1

I was shoved into the dirt. I tried and failed to avoid any getting any in my mouth. I coughed and sputtered a mound out. My hands were bound behind my back. I was grabbed by my matted hair and yanked standing; now I was annoyed as to why my earlier shoving was even necessary. I came face to face with a boy.  
He smirked at me, not in any particularly friendly manner. He was tall, one of those lean muscular types. He had messy brown hair and blue eyes, eyes clouded with darkness. A look I was familiar with, a face I was familiar with.  
Looking to the boys surrounding me now, he told them to leave us. I was now alone with this dark boy. He came closer to me, inches from my face.  
"Ciarda, fancy seeing you in MY domain." He purred.  
"Fancy, as in glad to see your kidnapping went smoothly?" I spat, quite literally. He only chuckled.  
Leaving me and crossing the forest floor he said, "Yes I suppose. Now, let's get to business shall we? You, I've heard, have something I want and I ALWAYS get what I want." He challenged, suddenly appearing in front of me.  
"As I'm sure you do, spoiled brat." I replied, arching a brow, an evil smirk of my own.  
I watched his darkness come out as he put a hand to my throat. I laughed through the choking pain. "I wouldn't test me, boy" I managed to get out.  
I saw a look of brief confusion cross his face, something that's rare for Peter Pan I'm sure; I knew I recognized him. I let my power loose. Dark smoke spilled around us from my heart and I felt my eyes burn, everything in my vision leaving blurry trails yet sharper and clearer than before. Pan stepped back in a flicker of fear that I caught, good thing his 'loyal subjects' weren't watching their terrifying dictator be afraid.  
I slipped out my bonds as if they were made of smoke themselves. I rose a foot or so off the ground, meeting Pan's height.  
" So it is you. You're one of the shadows, like the one in Neverland."  
I laughed at his obliviousness. "I AM the shadows... I MAKE the shadows." I lowered myself to the ground.  
"But how? You're so... young. The shadows have been here long before I-"  
" When accepted my fate, my heritage, I became immortal, never aging... so yes I'm still young, still naïve even, never experiencing the world as you have; yet still 'older'. You it seems, are a different story. You used one of my shadows for your own selfish reasons. I let it be, men have done worse with their power, my power. Besides, you wanted to talk business, right? Perhaps we can help each other, Peter. One dark spirit to another, what do you say?"  
" Deal." He smiled, holding out a hand, " You're more cunning than you look, dearie."  
I smiled just the same, about to take his hand when I hesitated, my power flickering out like a candle flame. I remembered the prophecy my father told me before he gave me our family power, the power of the demon of shadows. (I'm not a demon, just a vessel for the power. My family has held it since we were chosen.) The prophecy stated that the fifth child each generation of the family currently holding the power will lose their powers and memories of the power and be cursed to be mortal if he or she loves another truly...as the first demon stated that a person with demonic power should not feel love, the prophecy is kept as a warning.  
The thought crossed my mind. What if this relationship shifts from business to- to something else entirely? What if HE ends up being my curse? Would it be so bad? Either way, he should be warned at least...  
"Before we do this... She, in the slightest possibility, in the end, won't remember you." I said cooly, looking him in the eye.  
"She?"  
"Ciarda."  
"But you're-"  
"I know, that's exactly the point." I replied, "I know you don't understand now, but if the time does come...you will. It's a curse on me... I'm warning you... Just in case I f-"  
" In case you what, Ciarda?" His voice changing in a way I can't explain, not dark though.  
"forget the blessing it is to hold this power."  
He knitted his brow in confusion, "Alright, don't see what it has to do with me but good to know."  
He gripped his hand in mine, softly, shaking it. "Looking forward to working with you, shadow girl." He said, giving me a wink.  
I scoffed and headed to where I could see the glow of a fire behind the trees. I couldn't ignore that my heart... was beating a little faster than usual...

AN: DESPITE my terrible and non-existent track record for story completion... continue? Yes? No? Review? Your support keeps me going. I just LOVE this new Peter Pan, a story was a must. Anyway, for those of you wondering about Pan's selfish reasons for using a shadow... Y'all gotta get caught up on OUAT to have your minds blown.


	2. Chapter 2

I walked through the jungle trees and bushes to his compound, the owner, Peter Pan himself, quickly catching up to me. Ducking under the tangling vines, he asked me stupid questions,  
" Have you always been on Neverland?"  
"Nope, first visit. Been keeping low-key in the enchanted forest; taking special requests. I'm more of a supply and demand kinda deal. Anyway, I just noticed the interesting qualities the island possessed and followed my father's dying wishes to stake our claim, leave some shadows to keep things running. Luring children in was their idea, clever little demon spawn they are. They can be intelligent if created CORRECTLY. Then word got around about someone taking over, a human... YOU." I added with bitterness, " Like I said I let it slide but the mast- the demon wasn't happy. He marked me with the curse for real; we always thought it was just legend to scare us but nope."  
He nodded, "What's the mark? The Curse?"  
I sighed and stopped in our tracks, I pulled off my shirt, lifting the back of the second, revealing my bare back. Peter read the words, incorrectly, burned on my back aloud and gave a sound of confusion. Turning and getting my shirts in order,  
"et non est lumen ei filii Elathan. Children of Elathan have no light..." He'd probably laugh, " Love is a 'light' emotion, not for dark demons and their children. The curse is that if the fifth child, me, falls in love truly my memories and powers will be gone. That's what I meant earlier." I replied, gesturing to where we came from.  
" And you think that we'd-" he laughed, gesturing between us with a finger, "Pfft, I wouldn't worry."  
"Hey, I can't be too careful. I don't normally deal with other people that often. Besides if I was that weak-hearted I'd be a DEAD mortal by now. I'll have you know that I've had quite the lot of offerings before and after my powers, Mr. I'm-too-good-for-you."  
" Oh, so lust is still an option?" He purred with a raised brow, closing in on me.  
"Duh, it's one of the sins, many I'm sure you're familiar with."  
" You are still naïve for such an old soul." He chuckled, pressing me against the nearby tree. "But I won't try my luck just yet, shadow girl."  
With that he released me. I was confused. Why would he ask such a stupid question? Unless he was talking about-  
"Oh you mangy fox you! That's- that's- ugh! You're unbelievable! Someone ought to squash that ego of yours, boy." I yelled, running up to him to catch up, "Thank god the shadows say there's only boys here. Any female you treat like some- some conquest!" I was upset with myself, realizing the irony that I thanked god...  
Still reeling about his conquest ideals, I didn't notice when we reached the camp. Smiling he leaned to my ear and whispered, "Pan never fails." Before walking off to the bonfire and his so-called lost boys. I was furious. I can't believe I was worried for even a second for falling for this boy!  
All eyes were on us, well, me. All the boys were relatively young, younger than Pan, only one coming close or even older; He certainly was taller. He was leaning against the tree closest to us, his weapon leaning next to him. Gripping it as we neared he addressed Peter.  
"I thought this was given prisoner status." He said, glaring at me.  
I felt shadow slipping out my fingers as I glared back. Suddenly I felt Peter kick my foot as he replied,  
" Her STATUS is none of your concern, Felix. I can handle her." The last bit came with a look from Peter towards me. At this point I rolled my eyes, ultimately accepting Pan's blunt, and oddly perverted nature. Though for the rest of the boys' sake of calling him out he was somewhat discrete. He really was a teenage boy mind and body.  
I let what shadow I tried to release dissolve. I awkwardly followed as we joined the rest of the boys around the fire. One of the youngest boys pulled my shirt as I sat on one of the logs. I looked down to him. I may not be supposed to express light emotions but I couldn't deny how cute this little guy was.  
"Are you a lost GIRL?" He asked in a small voice.  
I smiled and said, " Sure, I guess you could call me that. I'll be sticking around for awhile."  
"Indeed." A voice bellowed, " And you should be inducted as such. What do you say boys? I think a fire dance is in order."  
As if those words were everything, the boys hollered and shouted, running in all different directions. Some rolled away logs, causing me to jump in a fright from my seat. Others tossed leaves and firewood into the fire, causing it to grow. All the while they painted their faces and grabbed their make-shift weapons. I was still so lost to this world.  
Pan came striding out, face painted and a flute in hand. What the hell was this, some cult ritual of acceptance? He grabbed a coconut full of face paint and came over to me. "Come on now, Ciarda! Get into the spirit." He called as he dipped a set of fingers into the mushy paints. I glared with untrusting eyes as he smeared the paints on my face.  
"I don't see the point, Peter." I muttered.  
"Like you said, you'll be sticking around. Might as well make you one of us. It eases their suspicions and it's fun." He replied. I rolled my eyes but agreed to play along.  
"I'm taking my shields down just this once, for FUN, as you'd have it." I moved my hands in a series of motions, feeling my shields against magic dissolve away. " Now I'm susceptible to your little tricks. But I can whip my powers out like that." I added with a snap.  
Shrugging, Pan put his flute to his lips and began to play. At first I didn't hear anything. I gave Pan a look like he had to be joking. The others were well into dancing and hollering. Shaking his head he moved closer to me, circling me as he played his haunting melody. I heard it faintly at first.  
Wanting to deny it I said, "This is so stupid I don't even feel any-"  
I felt my vision get like it does when my shadow power is being used. Gasping I made sure I hadn't accidentally unleashed it. No, It was nowhere. I realized, it must be Pan's music. He's enchanted it. I closed my eyes involuntarily. The music became the only sound I heard. It moved and faded through my ears. I heard the beats of my heart picking up.  
Peter's voice came in with the music, adding to the trance, " I know you hear it, Ciarda. " his voice sounding far away. "Let it take you." It whispered, brushing my ear.  
I felt my body slowly sway to the rhythm. I normally not nearly as graceful. Each part of my body was in sync with the music. Opening my eyes to the blurred world I moved my feet. I felt my arms raise. I even heard myself laugh, something I haven't truly done in years. I ran and jumped around the fire with the boys, causing them to whoop and shout for my arrival. I laughed and hollered with them. I saw Pan had put down his flute though the music played endlessly in my mind.  
I saw his blurry green image pass the circle a few rotations. Laughing I snatched him in, tossing him in the cycle. He decided to play along, dancing in the throng. I barely even noticed my vision starting to blacken around the edges. I didn't even realize when I hit the ground in complete darkness.

AN: yay chapter 2? I'd really like some feedback. PS. Ciarda is pronounced Keer-da, it means dark and Elathan is the Celtic demon lord of darkness


	3. Chapter 3

I heard the calls of the jungle birds before snapping my eyes open. I shot up, noticing I had fallen asleep on the ground, leaves sticking to my black hair. I combed them out and the rest of my hair as best I could. Tying it back in a braid I stood carefully. The lost boys were sleeping all around me like a minefield. I cautiously released a bit of my power and glided over them, landing out of earshot.  
Suddenly remembering, I put my shields against magic back up around my body. What was I thinking!? Dropping my shields for a magic piper boy I barely knew, what would be next? I walked until I found a tiny stream of water. I washed my face with the chilly liquid. I could still smell the earthy scent of mud, wood, and smoke. I really was in a trance, I had no control over my body yet I knew what I was doing. It was the equivalent of a drug stupor or having too much to drink. I didn't like it, someone having power over me.  
I heard the bushes rustle. I closed my eyes to hear exactly where. In almost one movement, I slammed the owner's face to the dirt, kneeing their back. I was feeling for their shadow, prepared to rip it out when I heard a muffled voice,  
"Good to know you like it on top."  
With a loud groan I released him, standing up.  
"Jeez, Peter! Do you know how close I came to-"  
" What? Killing me?" He doubted.  
"First lesson: Everything has a shadow, everything can be killed." I stated.  
Snatching a lizard off a tree trunk, I demonstrated. I placed a hand over it, feeling for the shadow's edge. I grabbed it and yanked before it had a chance to escape. It died right then in my hand. I released the new shadow back on the tree. Pan actually looked awestruck.  
"Excellent! Can you teach me?" He beamed, an eager twinkle in his eyes.  
" Is there a place we can go? Not so close to camp, to be alone?"  
With a smirk and a nod, "come along."  
Awhile later we reached a singular tree in a tiny open patch of tree-space. Peter told me he calls it his thinking tree, it's where he likes to hide out and sleep. Examining the area, I decided it was suitable for my purposes. I turned to Pan, silently regretting what I said next,  
"Take off your shirt-save it." I stopped him as he opened his mouth for a remark, "it's for the ritual." He followed my orders, hushing up. I did the same, certain places covered of course.  
"Do I at least get to know why the ritual requires us to be half naked?"  
"Not every man walking down the street can rip shadows from bodies, Peter. I need to transfer some of my power to you. It's not allowed, only used in the family for the total transference like when my father chose me to have the power and transferred it to me. Only, I'll only transfer a bit. Let's just hope it goes well. It's not a fun time, let me tell you. But, It won't be as bad as getting all the power at once." I stated, shuddering at the memory.  
"I think I can handle a little dark m-"  
"This not dark magic!" I yelled, "It's demonic energy being transferred into a human being. No one's supposed to handle it. You'll get the basic and weaker versions of my powers. The shadow reaping one of many."  
Clearly understanding the gravity behind my outburst, he nodded. I took some breaths to calm myself. I went over the steps in my head. I told Peter exactly what to say and when, what to do and how. I couldn't mess this up. If I did, sure I'd be weaker; but Peter... He would either become some possessed soul and vessel with no hope... Or die. I just needed to believe in myself and believe Peter is strong enough.  
"Hand me your knife, please."  
Slowly Peter took it out from its strap, almost as if it was sacred; and for our purposes it technically was, only the opposite. I took it. With a moment of hesitation, I deeply sliced my hand, the red blood seeped out. It dripped down like the melting wax of a candle. I smeared it around my hand. "Now you." I said quietly, passing the knife. He repeated my actions. "You can put it down now." I said next. Standing back where he was, I glided over to him, counting each step. I placed my blood stained hand over his heart. " In Elathan's name I bind thee. The bond of spirit, body, and soul. This gift of shadow, evil and darkness will shroud thee, further connecting thou to I. I, Clairda Marissa Anne Jameson do permit thee to SHARE in my demonic powers graced by the dark lord himself the great Elathan. I mark thee to share the powers: the mark of bondage surrounding the bonding print, darkness to cloud the face, shadow on the body and arms to create it as an extension of the being, flight to give swift feet, flame to give sight in the clouded vision, and evil to keep the dark lord with us."  
Peter repeated the process only instead stating he accepted the gift and swore to use its power to please our dark lord. I intertwined his hand in mine and closed my eyes, he did the same. This was the real test. All of that stuff before was only preparation. This was the real transference.  
I let my power drift out slowly. I opened my eyes, I needed to see if he would be ok. It snaked down my arms in a light mist compared to the dark cloud that consumed me during my transference. Though I don't remember much, I'd blacked out. It was the after psychological effects that got to me... I was actually scared for Peter.  
I saw his face wince in pain when the first bits of shadow started to sink in, traveling around his body. It was covering each limb. He made a small sound of hurt. I watched hesitantly as the bit of my inner shadow, my soul went to his heart. That was when he snapped. He screamed aloud, collapsing to the ground. He was shaking and convulsing, I watched his vision flash and trail like it was working but flickering on and off. I got to my knees.  
"Oh no no no... Peter? Peter! What did I do? What have I done? I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Please, please stop. Please! Come on, hang on you idiot. Pan never fails, remember?" I didn't even notice but I was crying, I was so scared. Killing someone wasn't something new for me. My line of work can call for it.  
But here I was sitting in the muddy mess, my knees hugged to my chest. The sounds of the jungle were the only thing preventing total silence. I couldn't watch, couldn't even look at him. I was reeling in my head, starting to accept that he'd be lost or dead. I suddenly heard a noise, an intake of breath. I dropped my pose and scrambled over to him. His eyes shot open. He looked... Scared.  
I realize that even the scariest and worst people put up shields... But don't I do that too? I didn't have time to think about that or myself. I cleared my throat though the effort was wasted because my voice still cracked when I spoke, " Peter?"  
His blue- green orbs finally landed on me. He was losing it, I remembered what he was going through well. It's something you never forget. I remembered the endless voices that called my name and mumbled unintelligible phrases. I remembered being locked in my room alone, being trapped in the shadows. I remembered having no one. My father left me to handle the change on my own before he died. It was the after effects of Elathan taking your soul, lasting for weeks. In Peter's case, it was only a piece but I had no idea how long he'd be trapped like this.  
"Ciarda I- why is this happening? Make it stop, please." He covered his ears and buried his head.  
I couldn't watch this. I knew what he was going through. The endless voices calling your name, whispering constant phrases you never hear. The feeling of a thousand eyes staring at you. The shadows surrounding you, always coming closer but never reaching you. It was the after effects of Elathan taking your soul; but, in Peter's case it was only a piece. I remembered every day of that torture. It lasted weeks for me until it finally ended. I had no clue how long Peter would be like this. I knew one thing: I won't leave him alone, like my father left me to take the change. It worried me to see him break down like this. I swore I would get him through this. What I was feeling wasn't love, lust, and I don't even know it was friendship. It was caring and understanding.  
I crawled over to him. I wrapped my arms around him. Pride and feelings didn't matter right now. He needed someone to be there for him and his list of those who would be was either very short or nonexistent.  
I brushed my fingers in his messy hair as he rested against my skin, the bloody symbols on our bodies getting disfigured. I told him over and over,  
"It's okay. I'm here. They can't hurt you, Peter. It'll be over soon, I promise."  
We stayed like this for hours. It grew dark. I put on my shirts and slipped Peter's on him. He was still lost in the madness. I went back to comforting him. I was used to this feeling. I was helping him while he unknowingly helped me. He needed me and I needed him. I may not need his sass, his darkness, or his perverted remarks; but, I needed the closeness. The feeling of being wanted and accepted, I didn't need love or at least I hope not, and I don't quite know how I feel about lust yet. This was enough.  
With a jolt Peter sat up from me,  
" The voices stopped but the shadows are still coming I can't I-" he whispered.  
"Peter!" I shouted, I took his face in my hands, " it's not the darkness or the shadows. It's just the night."  
I stood up and built a small fire, using what magic I could muster to create the flames. I hoped the bit of light would ease his vulnerable mind. I went back over to him, coaxing him to come to the fire.  
We sat in silence for a long while. Peter finally broke it,  
"I want to thank you, Ciarda. In all honesty. I was in a dark place, quite literally. So, thanks. It was a nice feeling." He didn't want to elaborate and he didn't have to. This much we had in common. The secret need to be needed and accepted.  
"The same to you I guess. I've basically never dealt with people but that doesn't mean I WANTED it that way. No one understood. Hell, who would want to be close to a monster like me anyway?" I said. I looked away from him and into the dancing flames.  
Peter scooted closer to me, "I do and I would."  
I looked at him, "Where did that narcissist, bossy, perverted brat I met before go?" I said with a smile.  
He gave a dark laugh, not as hearty as it could be, " He's still around. I'm not always like that. I just can't let the others think I'm going soft is all. Even I have my weak spots."  
" I was worried you'd think I had." I replied.  
" No, I - I needed that."  
" I figured in those moments you deserved what I never got... Are you sure you're all right?"  
He only nodded. I'm sure he didn't want to talk about it. I finally let myself relax. I flopped from sitting to laying down on the ground underneath me. The flames still crackled. I closed my eyes. I heard the rustle of leaves indicating Peter did the same. We could both use some sleep after the ritual. I arms pull me close. I didn't rip away, I accepted the closeness. I rested my head on his chest and drifted off.  
AN: I'd love to hear your thoughts and ideas on this so far! It seems like things are moving fast for Peter and Ciarda but as I've tried to clarify, they don't love each other, just well I don't really know how to explain it but if it was love this story would be over by now.


	4. Chapter 4

I opened my eyes. I was wondering where I was and why the surface I was resting my head on was warm... And breathing? I remembered last night: the ritual, Peter, the whole comfort session.  
"Ew!" I said aloud as I sat up from his chest.  
"What?" Peter asked.  
"You're awake?"  
"Yeah, didn't want to wake you. Why'd you 'ew' me?"  
For a flash I felt a flicker of hurt.  
"Well, cause ew!" I sputtered, gesturing.  
He rolled his eyes, "And you insist you're 'older'."  
"My soul yes, mind and maturity level no. Besides, it's gross; cuddling yuck and with you even worse."  
" What ever happened to 'oh, I've had offers' I'd assume 'cuddling' came with offer territory?"  
"What happened last night wasn't an 'offer' it was... generosity. Anyways, I never said I took any offers. I'm naive remember not stupid."  
"And I'm not saying last night was either just that I'd assumed YOU could be the grown up since I'M the immature perverted brat, remember?"  
"Okay, that was childish of me. I just..."  
"You're still being careful?"  
" I yeah, how?"  
"The bond thing, I kind of sensed your worry."  
"Then that hurt I felt, wasn't me. It was you?"  
"What?"  
"When I said 'ew', for a split second you were hurt."  
He shuffled. " Yeah, wondering why somebody could think this was gross." He replied, gesturing to his body.  
I felt nervousness.  
" We can't lie to each other now."  
"... I just was... content with the idea of not being repulsive to somebody."  
" I get it. Just don't get all soft on me, boy. " I said with a smile before turning away.  
"What was that? That flicker just then? It was something weird... Now you're nervous; what did you feel?" I stopped mid-step. Oh man this bond thing is going to get me killed. I already hate it.  
"Uh, nothing just a..."  
"We can't lie to each other." He used my own words against me. Turning my hands to fists, I mumbled a reply. "I'm sorry, what?"  
" I said, I thought: and in my defense it was only for a second and I definitely didn't think it on purpose and-" He arched his stupid eyebrows, looking at a particularly nice twig I muttered, "who could be repulsed by that."  
" Okay I'll be honest despite my narcissism I am surprised. I'll keep that in mind." He added with an evil smirk. Oh I am so screwed now.  
"Well, it's not like I like you or love you or anything! If I did I'd be gone remember?" I quickly retorted.  
"That may be true but," He said getting too close to me, " lust... Is still an option."  
"But, but I don't think that, I mean it wasn't, We just- I barely know you so so how can that be it?"  
"You don't necessarily need to 'know' to lust, Ciarda."  
"Okay but what if I don't know if I lust?" I was just spitting words out at this point.  
" What ARE you feeling then?" He asked, backing off. He wasn't being dark, more curious and amused. This was new territory for me.  
"Well um my heart is beating fast and and I'm really n-"  
"That's not what I mean. You don't want feelings right? That can lead to love and powers gone and what not?" I nodded," Well, take the feelings out of love and what's left?"  
I thought. It didn't make sense. Wasn't love basically all feelings? No wait, not always... take the feelings out of every bit and lust was left...  
" Oh jeez. I don't know." I said leaning back against a convenient tree. "I mean loopholes are great but I don't think I even want that. I mean, back to square one, how do I know?"  
" I don't want to be your undoing. Selfishly, if you go I go, bonded, right? The ritual business would've been for nothing. So, to make things fair, a win-win if you will, clear your little mind and think about what you want. Believe me I won't judge."  
I needed to admit, he had a point. What could it hurt, really? I'm surely 'old' enough to make decisions. I have no parents. I ran frustrated hands through my dark hair. It doesn't matter, right? I mean literally it doesn't. I cleared my jumbled thoughts and took a breath and looked at Peter, really looked. Annoying attitude aside, he was handsome, in that dark way, which makes sense. I'd seen him shirtless to know he wasn't weak or bony.  
As I continued to scan over him I felt a different darkness stir. I needed him. But, not in the kind way like last night; I needed him closer. I felt myself getting nervous but I choked it down. Peter must've sensed a change in me because he stepped closer with a confused look.  
"Ciarda? What are you thinking? Something changed."  
"That's the thing. I don't think I am thinking." I laughed. He smiled. I looked up to him, "Peter?"  
"What?" He whispered.  
" Close your eyes for a second, okay?" He agreed.  
I stepped closer until I couldn't anymore. I gripped his shirt and pulled it, bringing him with until I was back against the tree.  
I kissed him.

AN: um well, so much for friendship and feelings and comfort. That just kinda happened. If you guys hate it we can stop right there and pretend this never happened... Or you can tell me otherwise and ratings may need to be changed if I can muster the ability to go this route that kinda popped up...? PLEASE review!


End file.
